Baaaaaa...?

A very strange thing happened to me yesterday evening...I discovered that some of my relatives not only do not suck, but are positively delightful, sensible people.

I had fled my crazy, hostile, narcissistic nuclear family over the course of the 1990s...I gave them the option to treat me nicely or not at all, and each of the three in turn chose not at all. Saying I fled from them means I pretty much made sure that once they had chosen that course, I had no contact with them...which meant that of course I had no contact with the rest of the extended family, either. I hadn't had much contact with THEM since the '70s and early '80s anyway, so it wasn't like it was a real value I was losing.

Well, two of my first cousins, girls who are in their late 40s (though they'll always be 18 and 19 to me) and their kids visited us last night along the way on a little trip to Niagara Falls. OH MY GOSH, it turns out they are some of the nicest, sensible, cheerful people I know.

And their kids! I didn't know what to expect, because although my cousin Linda sounded awfully nice on email, you never know how that all translates...and it often tells in the kids. They brought Linda's 14-year-old son, and Trish's 14-year-old daughter and 8-year-old son. The kids...I so hoped they wouldn't be mumbling mouth-breathers, you know what I mean. The parents' real way of living usually tells in the kids...and the kids were WONDERFUL. The 14-year-old boy smiles and looks you in the eye (!!!!!) and talks about the way math is taught in schools, and comments that he really likes your paintings, and in a genuine way, not in a polite way. The girl smiles through all her braces at your daughters, and everyone participates with glee in the Egg Hunt that your daughters have set up throughout the house in anticipation of their arrival. And the 8-year-old wants to be a writer and he has Webkinz and Club Penguin accounts, they all play together SO nicely.

I don't know what to do with this information, I don't know where to put it yet, how to fit it into my world view: I may not be The White Sheep of the family after all, my parents and sister may be the black sheep. It's a disruption of a simpler view I had of life, and it's taking some time to know how to absorb it.